Weigh in day............ again

Drum roll please, it's weigh in day. It sure seems to come around very fast. I hope I do better than last week. I didn't post, but I gained .8 pounds last week. It seems like things started spiralling out of control again after Kurt's birthday party on the 15th. It made me start feeling Stephen's absence again. Stephen was looking forward to that party so much. It was all he could talk about at times. Only a very small handful of his friends came. I'm sure they are busy moving on with their lives. They are young and have their futures ahead of them. His friend Chad came. He saw the memorial photo and candle, it was hard on him. He didn't stay very long. I completely understand. I am more "desensitized" to that particular photo and candle, I see them EVERY single DAY!! But when something catches me off guard, it hurts like a sonofableep all over again. Back to weigh in. I have not exercised much at all this week. Last week I put in a full two hours, and still gained weight. I need to get back in the habit again. It's so hard sometimes, and other times it just feels natural and normal. My worst problem is that I'm not sleeping well. I've worked some different hours than I'm used to, and I don't like going to bed at night anyhow, so I'm not getting much sleep. One of these days it's going to even out again.

I'm feeling nervous about the weigh in. What will the result be? I've thought about Stephen a lot. I haven't worked on scrapbooking much this week. I've spent too much time in front of the television. That sums up my week.

(note to self)